Marriage: Women should not use sex denial to torture men- Experts

 A Medical expert, Consultant Obstetrician and Gynecologist, Dr Eric Okunna, said that the importance of a healthy sex life cannot be undermined in marriage.

The News Agency of Nigeria (NAN) correspondent, who sampled views of the people in matters of the family, in Awka on Tuesday, reports respondents are of the opinion that couples should not, deny each other sex, especially by the woman to her husband because the man is the head of the family and his feelings should not be toyed with, irrespective of the situation.

He said that a good sex is both emotionally and physically sound to cement a relationship between the two people involved in filial relationship.

“Sex relationship on itself is a medication to calm the body down of so many life challenges like stress, emotional sickness and is a good exercise to keep the body relaxed and fit,” he said.

Okunna said that sex helps to create a connection between the persons involved, especially in a marriage, and that it is very important to treat marriage as hallowed, therefore, women should not torture their husband by denial.

He said that sex should not be used as a tool for revenge in case of any misgiving between the couple because it is cancerous to marriage and should be totally avoided, the woman should devise other ways to demand attention from her husband.

“It is a natural occurrence to have disagreement between people in a relationship and marriage is no exception. There is no justification for any of the couple to use sex as torture to resolve their differences.

“Instead, sex should be a tool used to resolve any brewed issues between couples because it could be used to relax tensed nerves rather than a tool for disintegration.

“Sex torture or denial in marriage is a negative manner to handle marriage challenges because it could lead to home breakup,” he said.

Okunna said that there are benefits of sex than denial in marriage as with an orgasm it gives the body a natural pleasant high spirit and releases Endorphins which are hormones that block pain and make people feel good.

He said that sex is the important aspect in a marriage. Initially, the love and attention expressed play a crucial role to  hold the relationship together and sustainable.

However, he said sex becomes significant in ensuring the longevity of a relationship, without any sexual activity, though there will be everything materially but no intimacy shared.

“Love and recon are satisfactory in a marriage but sex plays an important role to build a good relationship and build mutual relationship among couple.

Okunna said that sex can be a source of torture for the man if deliberately denied, especially when there may be no militating factor.

He said such an action could turn the man into a wild creature as People have divergent thresholds in many things.

He said though that continuous demand for sex by the man can drive the wife crazy and thereby lead to torture for the man.

Okunna said that moderation is the key word in every human endeavor and suggested that the sex life should be moderated so that everybody would be happy and satisfied anytime the need arises to avoid boredom.

In a related report, Mrs Amaka Okeke, a retired teacher, said that sex is the oil that lubricates marriages and is meant to be well enjoyed by the two.

Okeke said that without sex there is no marriage as everything good comes from the union of two bodies called marriage.

She said that sex, no matter the reason, should not be denied to any deserving partner at any time regardless the time place and how it was demanded.

Okeke said that denial of sex to one’s partner is a torture and should not be encouraged in marriages as its negative implication is truly overbearing and could lead to divorce or want of alternative.

She said it is also a sin for the couple, especially the woman, to deny her husband marriage gift called sex and that the Holy Bible condemned the act as recorded in 1st Corinthians 7, verses 3 to 5.

The bible says “Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence and likewise also the wife unto her husband.

“The wife had no power of her own body, but the husband, and likewise also the husband has no power of his own body but the wife.

“The lack of sex in marriage brings toxic environment in the home and may suggest wrong impression to the young adults in the home and they may never wish to get involved in marriage.

“Such action would impede procreation thereby foreclosing God’s commandment to multiply and fill the earth,” she said.

Okeke said that women should pray to God to renew their strength and feelings, especially after child birth and at older age, so as not to deny their husbands their legitimate affection when expressed.

Mr Christian Beluchukwu, a young father, said that denial of sex in a marriage is disastrous to the union as it could make the man hate his wife.

Beluchukwu said that such an action applied either as a revenge to settle a quarrel, could back fire as that may lead to extra marital affairs which may end up in the introduction of a second wife in the family by the man.

“Sex torture is not a tool to be engaged in home management at all as it has no benefits to the relationship,” he said.

Mrs Adaobi Okafor, Assistant Director of Pharmaceutical Services, Nnamdi Azikwe University Teaching Hospital, Nnewi, said that it is a wrong way of living by a woman to use sex as a tool to handle the male when offended.

Okafor said that such an act stifles the family peace and creates unhealthy relationship between the couple and the children suffers most in such toxic environment in the home.

She suggested that such unhealthy acts should not be practiced or encouraged in families and appealed to women who resort to such an act to stop forthwith for the sake of peace and love in the family. (NAN)

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